Monday, June 27, 2011

Another Year Older

Well yesterday was my birthday. It was sad and somewhat lonely. Two years ago I got my job. Last year I got my house. This year was a reminder of how happy I was last year. I can remember posting all I wanted was a simple life and to be happy. I had it all for six weeks. The cute little house and true happiness. I keep asking why didn't Ray and I have more time to enjoy things. We had been through so much and we were finally enjoying life again. As sad as yesterday was for me I was so blessed. I received several text messages and phone calls but FB was the biggy. I had over 75 birthday wishes. It did put a smile on my face to feel so blessed.

We all like to blog about our homes and crafts. I personally enjoy the family posts just as much. I love how everyone seems to be living a simpler life. The economy being bad has been tough on everyone but it did bring some down to earth. I used to think having the most and best of everything was the way to be. Now I think back to family dinners and watching movies together. I realize how special those simpler times were for me. I cherish those memories now more than ever. The stuff is just that stuff. I would give anything for just one more simple day with Ray.

I want to thank everyone for all the wonderful comments. Several of you said you tried to email and it came back. Sorry I had put one D to many so the email address was wrong. I have now corrected my email so please feel free to email anytime. Once again thanks for sticking by me.


Friday, June 17, 2011


It's been awhile since I was last here to comment. I drop in every now and then and read your blogs. I have met so many wonderful people here in the past 2 1/2 years. I have been blessed with new friendships, many comments and gifts. You have listened to me complain and cry my heart out. I want to thank everyone for the kind words and emails. I still have days when giving up would be easier than the pain. I push myself to get out of bed some days. When Ray first died everyone told me it takes time give it time, but no one could tell me how much time. There is a country song by Sara Evans called I get a little bit Stronger. I try very hard to get stronger everyday. Although the song is about a relationship ending some of the lyrics really hit home. So to all of you who have stuck by me once again THANK-YOU!

I have decided to stay in my home and stick it out one more year. After Eleni graduates I will probably move. Until then I'm trying to make this house a home again. When Ray first died I had this need to get rid of everything. I started with his tools and clothes. I wished I had waited longer but my heart was breaking every time I seen or smelled his clothes. I still have tons of pictures of him hanging through the house. His sword collection is in the hall and his golf clubs in the garage. I could not erase the pain by giving things away. I am now in a giving away mood again. This time I feel the need to start over, I am opened to any suggestions. I love the prim look which I have in my kitchen! I don't know about my living room any pictures to share of your living rooms would be great. I can't afford new furniture right now so I have to work with what I have. Which the colors are burgundy,sage and mustard plaid. I think the pattern is called Thyme. I will be decorating on a budget. I just feel like I need a change. Speaking of kitchens mine is finally decorated. I will try to share pictures later. If anyone out there collects Boyd's Bears resin and stuffed please email me. I have too many and want to scale back. Bears free to a good home. Along with a change I feel the need to simplify my life a little more.

As many of you know I have had a rough couple of years. Four years ago after Ray had his mini stroke he really went down for awhile. I babysat at the time and volunteered at our neighborhood school. A friend called me one day and offered me a job with her at Wachovia Securities. Things were really tight and the girls were older so I took the job. By the time I started we had some serious financial issues. I put our debt into a debit program. I am happy to say I made my final payment today. It's a bitter sweet feeling. Ray and I were going to buy a newer truck when this was paid off. I will keep the truck we have because we worked together to pay it off and maybe one day I will be ready for a newer truck. Another country song comes to mind Don't Blink by Kenny Chesney. Things can change in the blink of an eye. If you get anything out of my blog I hope that you realize there may not be a tomorrow so make today and everyday count. Take the time to enjoy the little things.