Saturday, March 10, 2012

It's been awhile.

Life started moving in the fast lane. Eleni graduates this year so I was all wrapped up in the needs of a senior. We have already bought prom dress and shoes. Graduation dress, shoes, cap, and gown also all taken care of. She has already started tanning for the big days ahead. I can remember back in the day before prom everyone would be laying out trying to get a little bit of color. Ahh those were the days. I can remember going to the beach, lake, and even the river to get that summer tan hours and hours of just laying there. I must admit I can not take that heat anymore. I make it about 30 minutes and I'm done. I am a sissy now I also tan. Hey I'm a firm believer in fat looks better tan. :)

I have been asked a few questions about myself. I'm going to try to answer everyone hopefully.  I do not craft anymore unless it's to repaint something. I used to cross stitch a lot but now it hurts my eyes and I don't have the patience to finish anything. I do have several pieces in my house of cross stitches I have made in the past. I was a huge scrapbook junkie. After Ray died I basically quit taking pictures and have not done any scrap booking  in over a year. I have a few pictures from early years and of course Eleni's senior year to do. It's just not the same as before losing Ray. He would always want to see what I had done and always had something nice to say. I miss the feed back I guess not to mention the pictures of him!

I have been asked was I seeing someone to help me trough losing Ray. The answer is yes, at one time I was seeing a counselor, my primary care physician, and a psychiatrist. Now I only see the psychiatrist. I had an appointment with him last week. He says I'm still not where he would like me to be. I'm just not ready to accept all of this I will be honest. I still wish for a miracle. It's very hard going from a couple of 24 years to being single and alone. It's not a feeling I would wish on anyone. I have been asked by many do I think I would ever date again. My answer is NO! I just don't want to get that involved with anyone again. I could not stand to go through another loss like this. Maybe in time I will change my mind but I doubt it. Ray was and will always be the love of my life.

I want to tell each and everyone of you thank-you. You have been so supportive and kind. Thank you for sticking by me through my loss. I feel very blessed to call you all a true friend. Until next time remember to always say I love you and thank you. What a great place this would be if we all just remembered those two quotes. I hope you all have a wonderful Saturday.

Donna

9 comments:

Carmen S. said...

Oh Donna, I SO remember baking myself in the sun as well, laying there sweating like a pig to get that tan, lol, those days are over for me as well! You are always in my thoughts and prayers my dear, and do take tons of pics of Eleni, graduation is a big thing, I'm sure she is so excited:)

Susannah said...

We had to have a tan with all those strapless and spaghetti strap gowns. Today? Not so much! Although, I am waiting for that warm sun to shine on my face soon.
Won't be long. Graduation is a great time....it will make many memories for your daughter. Thinking of you with prayer.

Susannah

~The Boyd Homestead Farm~ said...

Yes, I remember those sun tanning days as well...I can't do it anymore, the heat bothers me within a short time, lol. Oh, the fun times of getting everything ready for graduation, what a special time :) Still keeping you in my prayers and it's nice to hear from you!

hugs, Trish

My Primitive Creations by Tonya said...

Hey Donna good to see you here ..Looks like you might just have to get that Scrap Book stuff out and start filling some of those empty moments with new memories of Your daughters Senior year..in a scrap book..Something tells me that Ray will be right there looking down sending his compliments to you as you scrap out each memory of her Senior year..the tanning...the shopping, the dresses and graduation...Many hours of scrapping to fill your time.. What a better way to fill those tuff & lonely times with positive thoughts & memories.. I know your daughter will surely be tickled about having a scrapbook of her senior year...
I'm blessed with easy to tan skin so give me a day or two messing in the flower beds or out on the back of a boat and I've got a great tan..I can't just lay in the sun..but when I was kid I thought nothing of laying out there for hours...What fools we were but the fun memories I have of my girlfriends and I seaking the best tan in town...

You take care of yourself and you know I am always thinking of you and praying that the power of positive thinking will help to heal your heart...

Hugs
Tonya

Lois Christensen said...

Nice to see you back! Getting ready for graduation and prom is exciting and busy. We did it last year! Now my girl is down in Florida at school and I miss her tremendously. Your question and answer segment was really nice. I'm glad you're continuing to get help! I used to cross stitch all the time and, like you, find that it's hard to do with my eyesight! Getting old!!! Hope you have a nice week and keep looking up! I know it's hard, but you CAN get through this!

A Primitive Homestead said...

I could never reall stand the tanning thing even when my mother had her pool. But I always wished I had a tan like the other girls & my yoinger sister who baked herself to no end. Oh but she looks much older. I get enough sun in my gardens for me. I love cross stitch items. I keep saying someday. Get loads of prom & graduation photos. Yes yes do what all have commented. Make them scrapbook pages of these most special events. Don't forget mother daughter photos of these events. That was the only time my girl would get her photo with mom. Shes not big on any photo taking of herself. Blessings!
Lara

My Colonial Home said...

Donna, thank you so much for being so open with us...we all do care and I'm really happy that you are still seeking some help - there are times we can't go through things alone...but even IF you didn't have the help of a professional - there is always God to lean on...remember that...he's the best professional and he listens!

How fun to have all these events going on in Eleni's life...she's going to have so much fun. And mom, you had better show us photos.


Hugs,
Karen

Tammy ~ Country Girl at Home ~ said...

I tanned for years, Donna. Until I started getting a little older and I took the wise counsel of some ladies and quit. I still miss it sometimes but then I see folks that have been tanning ever since I started and it does begin to take it's toil on the skin! So I just use the tan in a tube! lol!

Oh and when I was a teenager, it was lying out in the sun with baby oil and iodine! Yikes! I had plenty a sunburn to show for it too! :)

I think you should make yourself scrapbook for Eleni's graduation! I think Ray would want you to do that!

Still think of you often even if I don't get around to blogs as much as I would like. And I most definitely pray for you!

Hugs,
Tammy

Jamie said...

WHo hasnt BAKED UNDER THE SUN!!!!hahahaha just one of those things we go through part of the high school scene.
I think you need to get the scrapbook supplies out and start one for your daughter BC she is starting a whole new time in her life and what better way to look back on it then all decked out in a scrapbook.
Here is what I think of counseling if he isnt helping maybe you need to see someone more in a church therapist.My mother use to see a psychiatrist(sp)but than realized it was making everything harder BC they go to deep into the past and then it makes it too hard for you to overcome certain issues.
We are all here for you Donna~